"Why do I want to beat him up?
Posted: Sat Apr 05, 2025 6:29 am
– Pliny… but why?
– Because this boy spent his life writing letters to everyone and about everything. And since he was also pleased with himself, he even published his works so that no generation would escape him. And you know what? It worked. Because suddenly, being a prolific written source from a bygone era, everyone started basing their work on what he said.
– Yes, but… I don’t see the problem, dear Odious!
– The problem, my dear, is precisely what he was saying: if you look back at his career, everyone is trying to get rid of him. The Emperor Trajan even manages to get him appointed to the other end of the empire, but even then, Pliny writes to him, day after day, asking him what he should do about his doctor. Then about his doctor's wife. Then about his doctor's children. It's true. And generally speaking, he does this for everything he has to do, on every subject, and he does it in twenty letters because he was far too useless to be either clear or to make even a very simple decision. He's still the first guy in history whose replies even the emperor manages to make it clear that he's really getting on his nerves with his letters.
– Which still doesn't explain why…
Come on, my dear, it's so obvious!"
0
I let the sentence float for a moment above the guests.
“Because he invented spam!”
There's a horrified gasp as everyone thinks about their inboxes overflowing c level executive list with letters from mysterious troublemakers. Someone in the room exclaims:
"His name rings a bell, yes! Good heavens, isn't there a Pompeii story too? Wasn't he there?"
– Pompeii, the movie?
– The catastrophe.
– That's what I just said.
- I don't understand… "
0
I sigh again. Then I resign myself to explaining to them what it's all about: if we count the number of victims, can we consider the film Pompeii a greater catastrophe than the grim end of the city in question? Knowing that the eruption lasted for several days, is it good news to know that the film is only 1 hour and 44 minutes long? And finally: what was Jon Snow doing in this mess?
Without further ado, let's spoil my good ones.
– Because this boy spent his life writing letters to everyone and about everything. And since he was also pleased with himself, he even published his works so that no generation would escape him. And you know what? It worked. Because suddenly, being a prolific written source from a bygone era, everyone started basing their work on what he said.
– Yes, but… I don’t see the problem, dear Odious!
– The problem, my dear, is precisely what he was saying: if you look back at his career, everyone is trying to get rid of him. The Emperor Trajan even manages to get him appointed to the other end of the empire, but even then, Pliny writes to him, day after day, asking him what he should do about his doctor. Then about his doctor's wife. Then about his doctor's children. It's true. And generally speaking, he does this for everything he has to do, on every subject, and he does it in twenty letters because he was far too useless to be either clear or to make even a very simple decision. He's still the first guy in history whose replies even the emperor manages to make it clear that he's really getting on his nerves with his letters.
– Which still doesn't explain why…
Come on, my dear, it's so obvious!"
0
I let the sentence float for a moment above the guests.
“Because he invented spam!”
There's a horrified gasp as everyone thinks about their inboxes overflowing c level executive list with letters from mysterious troublemakers. Someone in the room exclaims:
"His name rings a bell, yes! Good heavens, isn't there a Pompeii story too? Wasn't he there?"
– Pompeii, the movie?
– The catastrophe.
– That's what I just said.
- I don't understand… "
0
I sigh again. Then I resign myself to explaining to them what it's all about: if we count the number of victims, can we consider the film Pompeii a greater catastrophe than the grim end of the city in question? Knowing that the eruption lasted for several days, is it good news to know that the film is only 1 hour and 44 minutes long? And finally: what was Jon Snow doing in this mess?
Without further ado, let's spoil my good ones.